Close your legs...

10 yr old Hannah overheard me watching Basketball Wives and heard someone say, "Keep your legs closed." So, she asked me what that meant. I simply said, without thinking, "means she sleeps with a lot of people." Then Hannah looks at me puzzled and said, "What's wrong with that? I sleep with you in your bed all the time!"

~Teri. L, California

Poisonous

‎4 y.o. Ison (with a fever) trying to tell us he doesn't feel well: I feel poisonous.

Scary Bieber!

4 y.o. Ison woke up this AM bawling and yelling out, "Mommy! Daddy!" I ran to his room to see what his nightmare was about. His reply, "Justin Bieber was trying to take all of us." TRUE STORY.

Bad Dream

4 y.o. Siu: Soooo....how was your sleep mom? (as he hops on my bed next to me)
Mom: It was good. How was yours?
Siu: It was bad! (shaking his head)
Mom: Why was it bad?
Siu: I had a bad dream. I pulled daddy's arm and it came off!
Mom: LOL (we're divorced!)

Michelle V., California

AWKWARD!

Mom: You are so cute!
4 y.o. Ison: Did you say that I'm cute?
Mom: Yes.
Ison: AWKWARD!

Homework

Mom during homework time: Osiris, you need to pay attention!
5 y.o. Osiris: How much do I have a to pay? You only give me a dollar and when I sleep in my own bed.

- Bev P., CA

SUNday

‎4 yo Emil: Sure is hot today. What day is it daddy?
Daddy: SUNday.
Emil: That's why!

~Myra M.

Poopers

‎4-y.o. Ison: Dad, I don't like to go poo at school cause I don't want teachers to wipe my butt.

Dad in a Bad Mood

‎4 y.o. Ison (after observing his dad in a foul mood): My dad's being a sore lunatic.

San Francisco

(While driving through downtown San Francisco, 11 y.o. Aisley rolls down the car window...)
Aisley: Oh, the smell of San Francisco...
4 y.o. Ison: It smells like poop!

Love & Marriage

3 y.o. Addi: I want to marry my brother
Mom: You can't marry your brother. He's your brother.
Addi: Then I want to marry my daddy.
Mom: You can't marry your daddy... Wait. What do you think marry means?
Addi: You kiss and the boy brings you flowers.

Marie I., San Leandro, CA

Happy Heart

‎4 y.o. Osiris: My heart felt like laughing and so I laughed. It must have been happy or something.

Beverly P., Union City, CA

Drama Queen

Mom: You're acting like a drama queen.
3 y.o. Addi: I'm a Drama PRINCESS!!!

Marie I, San Leandro, CA

Pumpkins are made of...

4. y.o. Ison: I know what pumpkins are made of!!
Mom: What are they made of?
Ison: Oranges!

Miracle of Life

4 y.o. Osiris: Mom, how did I fit in your belly when I was a baby?
Mom: You were very little.
Osiris: How did I come out?
Mom: (Deep sigh... should I tell him?) OK...well, you came out of my .
Osiris: Ouch! Did it hurt?
Mom: Yes, baby it did.
Osiris (Holding mom's hand: Mom, I'm so very sorry I hurt you.

Beverly P., Union City, CA

Abs

Mom: Ison, you gotta stop playing Wii in a little bit cause I need the TV for my workout.
4-year-old Ison: Oh, I know why you wanna workout. Cause you want abs.

Sesame Street Takes on Old Spice Commercial

Not the typical Kid Babble post, but we thought this was adorable...

Callerpitars

‎4 yo Ison: Mom, I know what "callerpitars" turn into.
Mom: Oh yea? What?
Ison: A butterfly!
Mom: Where'd you learn that?
Ison: A commercial.

Monsters: Watch Out for this 3-year-old!

Anatomy

‎4 yo Ison: Mom, does everyone have butt cheeks?

Mom: I think so...